5 Days To The Plane Door!

What a crazy week this has been. I realized once I hit the "single digits" until I leave, my anxiety level increased. Imagine that. I kept thinking, "9 days to the plane door!" "7 days to the plane door!" "This time next week, I'll be on a plane. This time next week, I'll be in Hawaii. AAAHHHH!!"

However, right now, I'm feeling really good about doing this solo. I'm really excited about it, actually. When I was on campus earlier this week, I was telling a couple of co-workers about it and they looked at me like I was crazy when I said I was going by myself. They asked, "WHY!?!" And I said, "Why not? It's a time to relax and regroup and it's something I want to do." Then they said, "Yah, but why are you doing it by YOURSELF? Aren't you scared?" I kind of smiled and said, "Of what? Being by myself?" Then I said, "This is my journey - I enjoy my own company and whether it's in OP or in Hawaii, it's the same company. Just different geography with different experiences."

I know that pre-BT I wouldn't have dreamt of doing something like this....however, breaking out of my comfort zone means change. And since I am not keen on staying stagnant, change is welcome.

Oy.

I know I say that now. I'll do a calmness check when I'm about ready to board the plane.

This is just one more leg of my journey that I will be absolutely cognizant of the "moments" to embed the film on my brain. (Thanks, Casie!)

So, this weekend is full of preparation....buying books, cleaning and packing. I think the hardest thing I've pondered is what I'm going to wear for the flight....freezing in KC.....80's in Hawaii. I don't think I'll wear my KU jacket. :)

It's A Go!

I paid for my cottage yesterday.....under a bit of an anxious moment, which BA so kindly walked me through. This is an exciting, yet risky, thing for me to do. If she had the time off, I'd definitely want her to come with me.

However, I know this is to be done solo.

Just like I did with BT, I am praying that whatever God wants me to learn about Him or myself or see about Him or myself, that I am open - and prepared - to do just that.

Let's all hope it's NOT like BT where all I did was cry. (Let us bow our heads). :)

BTW, I just want to say, that I'm not going to filter anything on this blog. This is a journey I want to embrace and write about....so if any of you who are reading it have questions, please feel free to ask.

Part of me doesn't understand why I'm feeling the way I am at the moment. This is a good thing for me. This is something I've been wanting, even day dreaming about, for a very, very, very long time. I can't even tell you how long.

So, in the wise and wonderful words of BA, I am consistently Stopping. Breathing. And Praying.

I'm sure, just like people have told me, that once I step off the plane, I will forget about any concerns or worry I may have at the moment.....and that I won't want to leave.

So here's what I have engrained in my mind, in the beautiful voice of Steven Curtis Chapman:

Miracle of the Moment - SCC

It's time for letting go All of our "if onlies"
Cause we don't have a time machine
And even if we did
Would we really want to use it
Would we really want to go change everything

Cause we are who and where and what we are
for now
And this is the only moment
we can do anything about

So breathe it in and breathe it out
And listen to your heartbeat
There's a wonder in the here and now
It's right there in front of you
And I don't want you to miss
the miracle of the moment

There's only One who knows
What's really out there waiting
And all the moments yet to be
And all we need to know
Is He's out there waiting
To Him the future's history

And He has given us a treasure
called right now
And this is the only moment
we can do anything about

So breathe it in and breathe it out
And listen to your heartbeat
There's a wonder in the here and now
It's right there in front of you
And I don't want you to miss
the miracle of the moment

And if it brings you tears
Then taste them as they fall
Let them soften your heart
And if it brings you laughter
Then throw your head back
And let it go Let it go, yeah
You gotta let it go
And listen to your heartbeat

And breathe it in and breathe it out
And listen to your heartbeat
There's a wonder in the here and now
It's right there in front of you
And I don't want you to miss
the miracle of the moment

And breathe it in and breathe it out
And listen to your heartbeat
There's a wonder in the here and now (here and now)
It's right there in front of you
And I don't want you to miss
the miracle Of the moment

Tickets are bought and in hand!

It's official. Tickets have been bought and arrived today, thanks to the lovely services of FedEx. The trip of my 37th year is set so there is no going back! Hmmm....how many people want to guess how excited, anxious and a tad bit overwhelmed I am at the moment? I seriously cannot believe that I am doing this.

I am.

And it's well deserved.

Ask me in 2 weeks how I'm feeling. And hope I don't pass out from nerves. :)

Here is the cottage I will be staying at: http://www.pathless.com/nanawale/ I am in the Hale 'Io Cottage....for 10 glorious, relaxing, regrouping and recharging days.

On a side, yet incredibly important note:

For those of you who don't know, Velvet's boyfriend, Bret, is in the ICU in Wheaton, IL, sick with food poisoning. Please add him to your prayers. He's had an incredibly rough day so a quick and speedy recovery would be a Blessing. Also, please add Strength and Peace to the list for Velvet. She has not left his side and, although she may not ask directly for it, she needs your warm and loving words to hit God's ears as well.

I love you all and BA and Bret - my prayers for you are never-ceasing. I love you.